this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize