I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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