I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I want to make a zoo with you.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Sext me about skeletons
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
