remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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