Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
