I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize