Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
