Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
COCAINE IS GR8
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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