It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Randomize