Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
