woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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