how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Randomize