And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
