goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
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