He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize