you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
