i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
