I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
