she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
