just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
