I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
she pinky promised me she was 18
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
