i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
