To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize