How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
