I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
