Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
