Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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