i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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