Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
