Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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