Just cropdusted the office
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
