I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
