I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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