He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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