Me too!
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize