So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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