just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
