Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
