Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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