I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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