i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
