Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
