If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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