i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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