dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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