so explain again why im purple
no
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Is it penis luge time yet?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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