i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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