it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
