CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I'm having to shit out rocks
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
