If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
